A short play!

12 x 12Another notch in the literary bed-post! Drum-roll…

Saturday night my short play Mummy, Mummy, Mummy was performed at the Potato Shed. This little play had a very long genesis. Way back when I was recovering from post-natal depression, a friend and I applied to our local council for a grant to write a play on er, PND. We were successful! And then, what with life and illness and children and attempting (and failing) to collaborate, I am ashamed to admit that we ended up giving the grant back!

Yes, I can hear all you writers throwing up right now – and I’m sorry, but you know, sometimes life happens. Anyway, at the time I started writing something on my own – the team work thing for one reason or another didn’t really come together. And that something was the short play that was performed on Saturday night.

The night was called 12 x 12 – the brainchild of the Three Triple 2 theatre company – with the idea being that 12 plays of roughly 12 minutes duration were performed on the 12th night of the 12th month. It was great to go along to something creative and be able to simultaneously enjoy the fact that I had participated and relax because there was nothing for me to do but sit back and enjoy. (A million years ago I did perform in student theatre and although it was great fun, it also just about gave me a coronary – but that’s another story).

I was not allowed to tell anyone which play was mine because there was to be an audience vote at the end for the most popular play. I was quite diligent about this although Him-In-Doors joked that it was like branch-stacking and I should be telling all my supporters, attempting to shore up my vote. The best play – in my view – and the one which actually won the audience vote was unpromisingly called Playwriting 101. It was a great concept. Two guys in a bar trying to write a play and their ideas magically coming to life on stage. Ie. We need a barman – let’s make him Scottish. Cue: Barman pops up behind bar and says ‘Haggis!’ You get the idea. It worked beautifully and concluded with the writer getting the cute barmaid to give him her phone number. Also, note to self, funny plays win!

abba-money-money-money-melba

I was happy with how my play was performed. It was a monologue and although ideally I would have liked an older actress to play the part (it was played by a young woman in her 20s), I think the actress did a great job. I was particularly pleased that they included a parody I wrote to the tune of Abba’s Money, Money, Money. I’ll throw it in here for anyone interested…

I feed all night, I clean all day, to keep this kid alive I pray,

Ain’t it sad

And still there never seems to be a single second left for me

That’s too bad

In my dreams, I’m back at work

I’m no longer a humble clerk

I’m CEO with heels and cash, I’m free from spew and nappy rash.

 

Mummy, Mummy, Mummy

I’m a yummy Mummy

In the rich man’s world

Mummy, Mummy, Mummy

Feelin’ crumby

In the rich man’s world

Aha-ahaa

All the things I can’t do

Now I’m home and bein’ Mummy

It’s a rich man’s world

 

A job like that is hard to find and they won’t let me go part-time

Ain’t it sad

And if I got a childcare spot, my brain it seems has lost the plot

That’s too bad

So I must leave, I have to go

Have a shower and lose the mo

And have some sex, a cup of tea, a panadol, I need to pee

 

Mummy, Mummy, Mummy

I’m a yummy Mummy

In the rich man’s world

Mummy, Mummy, Mummy

Feelin’ crumby

In the rich man’s world

Aha-ahaa

All the things I can’t do

Now I’m home and bein’ Mummy

It’s a rich man’s world

 

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